I do a tricky job, I'm on show most of the time, need to watch what I say and do, and who I am is a big part of that.
I've asked at work to be called Rach. I've been doing this consistently now for 6 years and longer at 1 off events
When I worked in the student world most of the time this really wasn't a problem but out in the adult world its apparently too informal, improper and people just won't.
Now this isn't about the people who do it accidentally, they apologize, it's fine, we all slip into bad habits.
But so many (mostly elderly) people tell me, "but Rachel is such a lovely / biblical name." Or "I can't call you Rach, I'm going to call you Rachel." Or best "I'll be the only one who calls you Rachel" oh I wish!
Then I check their name and it's short for something, or it's their middle name. But it's not the full name their parents gave them.
And I smile and say that's ok, and make a joke about how formal we'll both be by using the full names, but generally call them what they asked to be called cos names are important and I don't want to be petty, I just want to be Rach.
I know it's not the end of the world, but respecting people enough to use the name they ask to be called by is important and respectful and it's never up to us to decide what we want to call someone when they have asked for something else. I know there have been times I've shortened people's names when they prefer the full version and for that I'm sorry. Cos it's not until I was regularly and purposely ignored that I really noticed how much I care about what I'm called.
